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Post -Beat Poetry in China:
Preface to Selected Poems of Post-Beat Poets in Chinese edition
If Wen Chu-an had never attended the 1997 Lowell Celebrates Kerouac Festival, Selected Poems of Post-Beat Poets would not exist. While a visiting professor at Harvard University, Wen encountered the Post-Beat phenomenon at the Festival’s Small Press Fair, where writers ranging in age from thirty to sixty sold books of poetry they had published through small presses or by themselves. While my wife, Elaine Kass, and I were selling my books and recordings at our table, Professor Wen introduced himself and told us he was translating Jack Kerouac’s On the Road into Chinese. Impressed with his ground-breaking, I invited him to talk with Elaine and me at our table. Over the next hour, possibly two, we discussed the Beat Generation and its successors at great length, and agreed to remain in contact.
After Professor Wen returned to the West China University of Medical Sciences in Chengdu ( now merged into Sichuan University ), where he is a Professor of English, we continued to communicate by e-mail. In addition to discussing the work of Kerouac and Allen Ginsberg, we discussed the difficulties I experienced in finding publishers, distributors and reviewers for my work and told him I wasn’t alone, that the American literary establishment had overlooked virtually an entire generation of writers who continued to advance the work of the Beat Generation’s founders. Impressed with the work of Post-Beat Generation poets that I sent him, Professor Wen interviewed me about the Post-Beat writers. His interview, “Beneath the Underground: Post-Beat Writing In America,” appeared in Contemporary Foreign Literature, accompanied by poems from five of the twenty-four poets who appear in this anthology. After its publication, Zhang Ziqing, editor of Contemporary Foreign Literature, discussed publishing an anthology of Post-Beat poetry with Professor Wen. Professor Wen approached me about editing the anthology, which I readily agreed to do.
The first problem I faced in editing an anthology of Post-Beat poets was establishing a definition of Post-Beat. Defining Post-Beat poses a challenge similar to Wittgenstein’s discussion in Philosophical Investigations about the difficulties inherent in defining a game. Wittgenstein said, We do not know the boundaries because none have been drawn.
The boundaries of Post-Beat literature have never been drawn. Unlike the Beats, the Post-Beats never existed as a literary movement, or even a closely-knit network. They emerged spontaneously throughout the United States. Some were social contemporaries of the original Beats, others encountered them peripherally. Many only read about them. A significant number of Post-Beats came of age in the 1960's. Lacking a marketing genius such as Allen Ginsberg to work behind the scenes on -13-
their behalf, they worked their way as individuals through a literary landscape whose homogeneity had dissipated, in part because the influence of the Beats extends far deeper into American literature and culture than many Americans realize. Kerouac’s work did more than launch the rucksack revolution he described in The Dharma Bums; his Spontaneous Bop Prosody influenced the New Journalism of Tom Wolfe and Hunter S. Thompson, and the Language Poetry of Clark Coolidge. His recordings of prose and poetry with jazz accompaniment anticipated the Performance Poetry currently practiced in American Poetry Slams and the contemporary mixed-media genre known as Performance Art. William Burroughs’ exploratory literary techniques influenced much of the experimental fiction that has emerged since the 1960's, ranging from Avant-Pop and Metafiction to aleatoric texts, as well as several younger generations of science fiction writers. Through its frank discussion of his homosexuality, Allen Ginsberg’s poetry broadened the range of subject matter deemed acceptable as literature. Without Ginsberg, as poet and social activist, the fields of Gay, Lesbian and Feminist literature might never have developed. In today’s heterogeneous literary landscape, many of the writers influenced by the Beats write in genres whose existence the Beats inspired, but which are not considered Beat. Moreover, since the corporate takeover of the publishing and bookselling industry that began early in the 1970s, most major publishers only print the work of rock stars, former presidents and other media figures whose occasional poetry, regardless of quality, guarantees profits.
Nevertheless, a loose network of writers throughout the United States designates its work as Post-Beat. Although not a school or movement, they inhabit the alternative culture that now exists in almost every American city of moderate size. They publish their work in micro press magazines, which publish fewer copies of each issue than the small press publications that receive college and government funding. Some of the micropress editors publish books by writers within their network, while other writers publish their books by themselves. For purposes of this anthology, Professors Wen and Zhang and I agreed to focus on this ad hoc network, whose work visibly extends the achievements of the Beats into new poetic and narrative techniques, as well as issues of lifestyle, social justice and spiritual questing. Many of the poets selected for this anthology recite their work in public, frequently with jazz accompaniment. Several of the poets in this anthology studied at Naropa University, arguably the closest thing to a Post-Beat academy.
With few exceptions, such as Anne Waldman, who serves as Director of Naropa’s Jack Kerouac School of Disembodied Poetics, the Post-Beat poets have not received public or critical recognition for their work. It is hoped that this anthology will bring their work to a literary culture that will appreciate the fresh and unique poetry they offer the world. — Vernon Frazer -14-
Lawrence Carradini
Born April 18, 1953, in Queens, New York, Lawrence Carradini holds a Bachelor of Science degree in Zoology and a Master of Science degree in Vertebrate Reproductive Physiology and Physiological Ecology. His poems have appeared in magazines such as Bouillabaisse, The Boston Poet and The Cafe Review. His poetry has also appeared in several anthologies: Dialogue Through Poetry -2001, Concept #3, and the Barnes and Noble Anthology, Poetry Showcase . He has recently had poetry translated into Chinese in the journal Contemporary Foreign Literature . A collection of his poetry, BURNING HEADS, is published by VB Documentation Enterprises. He read from Jack Kerouac's On The Road, with original Kerouac musical collaborator David Amram at the July, 2000 opening of the two month exhibit "Kerouac's Northport." A resident of Lowell, Massachusetts, Carradini is the President and Chairman of the Board of Directors of Lowell Celebrates Kerouac! He is a senior staff member of the Massachusetts Biologics Laboratory (now part of the University of Massachusetts Medical School). His biographical sketch is listed in five Marquis Who1s Who publications, including: Who's Who in America, Who's Who in the World, Who's Who in Science and Engineering, Who's Who in Medicine and Health Care, and Who's Who in the East. -15-
After The Talking
It's the jitterings that get me mostly,
in the back jointless nest
behind the knees.
The rumpled stilt skins of my long legged youth
now abandoned. Me?
Making ends that never.
I go from one same thing to some other. I go from one (same thing?).
I go from...
I
go.
Jiggle the tank
handle.
This!
This is the last front before exit.
Now, age is the toll collector.
I cannot run from another star. The explosion will outstrip me. The bullet is caught between my teeth
for one last time. I am not old. I am lonely! I am not going to take this lying. One more night and I will have it settled. One more refrigerator door. One more outside cat. -16-
One more fluffy at the unbitten end of a candy. Get out of here, you shadow! -17-
Flexible Head dedicated to Han Shan Small cans of vinyl, This cup, And beans. Sing - Sing - Sing - A lover, Bones on the carpet, Read me. Los Angeles is not. San Francisco - River bends. River bends. -18-
Just Above Freezing
I am fainting.
I am wondering why the birds
fly south
when it is seventy-nine
degrees
of wonder, why it is warmth of wonder
that keeps me questioning
if -
I am fainting. If I am holding
on
To simple things I am wondering why?
I am wondering why it is that something that should be as simple as love creates convolutions twisted pathways crossing brain-loops cross-hemispherical cross- wired wireless mix mastered and slashed on some vinyl of the needled mind? I am wondering -19-
why
the needle breaks - the skin is thin flakes surrounding the drifts. We are snowmen melting. We are puddles after bonds broken, we are left The Dog. Without a cat. Each bird a dream. I am fainting; blurred, it looks as if all the birds have flown. -20-
Out There where horses run in air are windows and unnumbered tables Cranes and trees bend knees are crossed No dot above my eye ( another spice ) No-one is shattered By my desire One hand clapping one Over and Over -21-
And Again Our Mocking Bird is back. I have been waiting. She like me, sitting on the antennae; Squaw Bird score held, loosely, in her left hand. If ever there were a reason to believe it is time to renew our love of life, it is now -22-
A Second Look It was a Cormorant I thought, but large I looked, and saw a Loon. -23-
Terra Cotta Pater Claypot familiar, an army moves on its feet. You've let moss grow beneath. Let that be a lesson. Dry socks. A woman moves through her own fire. Find your own spark. -24-
Erin Fly'n Screen Gems, She sees Screen Gems, shimmering dance-like the way she moves across The Fantasic's minds... Aye! Such Pirate thoughts. -25-
Steve Dalachinsky
Steve Dalachinsky was born in 1946. His work has appeared in Long Shot, AlphaBeat Soup, Xtant, Lost and Found Times and Blue Beat Jacket, as well as in the anthologies Beat Indeed!, Downtown Poets and The Outlaw Bible of American Poetry. His most recent poetry collections are Subway Assemblages and A Superintendent's Eyes. An avid performer, he has recited his work at Cornelia Street Cafe, St. Mark's Poetry Project and the Vision festival. His 1999 CD, Incomplete Directions, features him reciting poetry in collaboration with improvising musicians such as William Parker, Thurston Moore and Vernon Reid. -26-
Post - Beat - Poets (We Are Credo #2)
we are the post beat poets we are the t.v. generation we are the true light of dope sex & profanity
we are the afterthoughts of post war experimentation we are the results of a nation in turmoil & change
we are the ultimate over 30 crowd
spoiled seasoned & prejudiced
we are the Atom bomb Anathemas & the LSD Corruptors we made pot a household word
and caused our parents to rebel
we have tried to make clear
all the knowledge that has been put down before us
we are the post-beat poets inspired by tigers
queers
wife killers
yage eaters bookshop owners freedom fighters junkies
priests & jazz.
we tried the coast on advice of holy word and read the holy zen scripture
on lonely beaches
with wine and music
in lonely forests
awake on pills
& settled back slowly into city lights where hearts have always seemed to once again return.
some of us have families
& work hard
while some take it easy the hard way
some of us lived in the open like Jack
& now spend hours in front of the tube
angry & anti our former liberal selves but we all still write our words their words all words for our SELF & everyone we get crazy drunk like Corso yet sweeter flowers never grew -27- - “Now’s the Time” - Charlie Parker
& holier-than-thou like Ginsberg
we get satirically surreal like Burroughs
adding up time like so many star ship stereo ghosts we shot it too
& watched it too
drawing those demons in the chelsea hotel
we’ve become chroniclers of each others’ lives sifting styles & stealing moonbeams
as we sit with mother earth between our toes swooning
we go off to monasteries to worship the fat man & write the haiku
we never forget our friends
occasionally one of us disappears into the karmic mists of forever never to return
& others just remain silent & musical growing more profound every year
we are the post beat poets
becoming more certain & proud of our immediate heritage while discovering the cool night eyes of the honey-colored cat lying lazy on the carpet near the color t.v.
hip & classless very primitive 20th century very well informed we all have our specialties our meanings our personal styles our beliefs always changing & always the same we all have our time & our time has come. -28-
Empire
the rain has stopped for us today the sun comes out at sunset the wind brays sweetly thru the now pale onion flowers open to a new diversity the sounds of equivalence & rhyme but it is still and always will be true Columbus never stopped here. -29-
something ( for Cooper-Moore )
he screamed something
or sang something
about the agony & the dream
& his flesh like keys depressed slid open imperceptibly
& light of early night seeped thru reprinting “no” words
from a book before books were written dancer here before the light spun the world into chaos & toothaches began stood on one leg on the downside up of the world & rivers began i wake up spinning & still don’t know where i am. -30-
rear window 1
she’s in her underwear
she’s fixing the curtain
she just took a shower
she’s vacuuming the house
she’s talking on the phone
finally that stool is occupied she smokes with her left hand does the dishes with her right she has a tattoo above the left cheek of her arse she has blond hair dresses well has a bicycle stays up late it’s hot it’s august the room is empty -31-
rear window 2
the girl across the sunlit alley stands 1⁄2 naked by her window most mornings
....the sparrows are elongated & aggressive it’s late afternoon she’s wrapped in a towel the curtains are fluttering she rests the towel on the window ledge the towel says LUCKY STRIKE. -32-
rear window 3
up early. clouds. downpour. clouds.
vacuuming. washing the floor. making love almost an hr.
biting. fingering. playing around. torturing exasperated breasts. i tell her to keep her clothes on. i naked.
she more orgasms. wine.
me thrusting gently into her wine filled mouth. naked i rise.
the girl across the way is drying her hair in the sun. she’s been to the beach. somewhere warm. no rain. she sips her coffee. shakes out her towel. sniffs her duffel bag. our love making has cleared the sky. -33-
overcast ( for Gregory Corso )
you look like
Artaud
Louie
all thin days
grey & rain threatening
not unseen sunsets
or forgotten years
the red white & blue flag
& slowly unfurling in a
drooping
& ghastly nights
maybe Geronimo looked like this
you say “i can’t breathe”
“please” you say -
the old pale brick across the way
these white walls of your room
the grey carpet filled with cigarette burns your ashen skin filled with tracks
the small red & blue tattoo
the brightest thing about this fairly airy room
soft cool wind
sheltered yet vagrant i mean badly
your back hurts badly
you look like
your long still perfect fingers she holds
“NO MORE STOMACH” you say yes it’s still there she assures you rubbing it
your eyes roll up toward your brow
then down toward the cold glass of water as it approaches you
you look like Socrates if he would have lasted this long toga intact or any fallen hero with an attitude
who might have been able to make it to the end of the line -
the end of the line where is it? / chair / bed / unicorn / “MY BACK” you say “MY BACK” the sky says chicken little the sky.............. written at Gregory Corso’s bedside in his apt. on Horatio St. NYC 7/24/00 -34-
Enid Dame
Enid Dame was born June 28, 1943. She received her B.S., from Towson University, her M.A. from the City College of New York, and her Ph.D. from Rutgers University. Her publications include the poetry books On the Road to Damascus, Maryland, Lilith and her Demons, Anything You Don't See and the forthcoming Jerusalem Syndrome. She co-edited the anthology Which Lilith? Feminist Writers Re-Create the World's First Woman with Henny Wenkart and Lilly Rivlin. She co-edits Bridges, a Jewish feminist magazine, and Home Planet News, a literary tabloid, with her husband, the poet Donald Lev. She teaches full-time at New Jersey Institute of Technology and part-time at Rutgers, where, in the recent Wintersession, she introduced a wonderfully receptive class to the work of Allen Ginsberg. -35-
The Woman Who Was Water
The woman who was water lived on the edges of rooms, knew when to withdraw.
The woman who was water came to Brooklyn,
and filled every basement.
The woman who was water left all of her lovers
clean.
The woman who was water insisted no one understood her, saw herself gentle as mist,
a rain-pearly morning, a sweet lilac fog. So, when she battered at shingles, gnawed through foundations,
burst out of pipes,
she knew she was offering love. Why didn't people want it?
The woman who was water was not analytical. She knew three things: They couldn't pass laws against her. They couldn't declare her harmless. They couldn't exist without her. The woman who was water could power a city or drown it. -36-
Riding The D-Train
Notice the rooftops,
The wormeaten Brooklyn buildings. Houses crawl by,
each with its private legend.
In one, a mother
is punishing her child
slowly, with great enjoyment.
In one, a daughter
is writing a novel
she can't show to anyone.
Notice your fellow riders:
the Asian girl chewing a toothpick, the boy drawing trees on his hand, the man in a business suit
whose shoes don't match.
Everything is important:
that thin girl, for instance,
in flowered dress, golden high heels? How did her eyes get scarred? Why is that old man crying? Why does that woman carry a cat in her pocketbook? Don't underestimate any of it. Anything you don't see will come back to haunt you. -37-
Night Shift
You hang up the phone and drop
out of the world.
I feel you out there pushing your taxicab around its orbit.
Most of the men
I've known well
have worked the night shift:
come home uneven mornings half-asleep
never hungry
for ordinary meals
leaving notes making love in odd corners of time.
The problem with lovepoems: all of the words
have been spoken already.
I try to find new ones
in little-used places: under my desk,
behind the shower stall on the other side of the skylight. At midnight at one AM I'm still at work. Perhaps you'll call me later between fares from a diner beside a highway somewhere. Meanwhile my space piles up with paper scraps torn envelopes -38-
a magnifying glass. There's somewhere I have to get to tonight without leaving the room. -39-
Dream Wedding
The poet's widow
plump blonde middle-aged self-possessed showed up at your dream wedding,
loaned you her body--a rite you couldn't refuse-- but wouldn't buy you a drink.
You made love in a fade-out. You didn't want to hurt me.
The dream bar wasn't familiar. Everyone wore elegant clothes.
You ordered Chardonnay
even though it made you cough.
Your old friend, the youngest Beat Poet was wearing a wooden throat,
a wooden protruding handle.
You asked, How does that feel?
He sighed, I got my life, I still got my life. When you woke up, you were cold. You needed a blanket, a throat lozenge. I curled around you, a thick quilt. All that morning still unmarried we kept falling in and out of sleep. -40-
Beach
Sept. 14, 2001
When my city is damaged and broken,
I go to the beach.
It's a city beach down at the edge of Brooklyn
hemmed in by a subway on stilts a block of apartment buildings. But it smells of real salt and seaweed.
The sky above it is clear.
It sees all the way to Europe.
I glide through my ritual steps
In the shadow of fishermen
whose rods bend like saplings
over the promising water.
A gray-haired man darts by with his graying spaniel.
His friend jogs slowly, reading a Russian newspaper.
A woman raises her arms as if in prayer,
or is it an exercise?
Jellyfish gleam on the sand
like glassy paperweights
holding everything down.
And here is a Monarch butterfly brave black and orange
down at the rim of the ocean sipping water from sand grits as if they were flower petals. as if it were not out of place as if it were not in danger as if the city behind it were not in need of mending. -41-
Bulbs
For Patricia Fillingham
You gave me six daffodil bulbs
to plant in my upstate front yard
letting each one stand for an unrescued name entombed in the Tower wreckage.
I carried the box to my mountain, set to work with a shovel.
It proved slow going
that ungiving October day.
One of the bulbs had split:
two bodies joined at the stem.
I thought of those mythic co-workers who held hands before they jumped.
My shovel kept finding rocks
or pieces of Catskill bluestone. Finally, I grubbed out six holes.
I propped one bulb in each cavity.
Then clawed at the compost heap, hoping to strike riches:
black earth busy with slick worms, mother's moist fudgecake batter.
But luck wasn't with me that day. my yield was a thin brown
mix from a grocery box.
I trickled it over the bulbs,
thinking of other gravesides: the ritual shovels of earth jaggedly hitting the casket,
our last conversation
with our well-known dead. I thought: I'm burying six people I probably never knew, their bodies unfound their names amputated. All we'll have is six flowers, if they actually bloom next Spring, if we're here to see, to remember. -42-
The Space Between
Coming in from the country to teach a poetry class, the bus paws through sky
an hour and twenty minutes a page waiting for images to chew at its corners,
a pool where animals gather and drink.
My thoughts collect.
They are curious,
but not unfriendly.
They let me touch their noses.
blank and golden
I left a dark house:
hurt ceiling man with an aching foot
two unfrozen roses in aspirin water.
My life: which will keep on moving without me another twelve hours.
The sun pulls the bus into deeper morning, into the tunnel into the city where everything starts at ten. The space between here and there is luxurious as a sudden shower of yellow leaves holy as a clean desk seductive as an empty room. -43-
ENTERING THE CLASS
I enter the class like a house
which I do not own,
extracting the key from the flowerpot. I enter the class like a child
re-enters the womb.
I enter the class like a confident swimmer dives into the layered ocean,
knowing its floors are littered with treasures:
jungly blossoms and salty nutritious vegetables pocketwatch eyes flicking open
shipwrecked weapons transfigured machinery bones washed clean of their memories
dulled jewels that suddenly flash when we thumb them to life.
I enter the class like a sleeper
enters the dream that will subtly shift her life a few degrees in an utterly different direction. I enter the class like a waker enters the morning knowing that something will happen within the walls of its light. Wintersession 2002, Rutgers-Newark -44-
Motherdream
In the wintry Pittsburgh light, in the small, darkening room, she sits on her wedding bed, folding a bedspread
down into smaller parcels.
till it's a squat pillow.
It's medicinal green tufted
as a stubbled used-up field:
nothing she would have purchased
or made for this room, when she lived here. She tells me she's made a mistake.
She says she has to get rid of everything she's acquired.
Yes, even a few things of mine. A pile of fabric appears:
a litter of small tumbling animals. I beg her to let me keep
the aquamarine Indian cloth
I'd bought at Azuma
when I first moved to the Village,
breaking away from her house.
Its color felt suave and distant,
a Gauloise cigarette tipped at a rakish angle a cup of espresso
sipped at a sidewalk café.
Then the dark tangled pile of denims! "I need these memories," I insist.
The sky outside has recovered its light. It fills the room unblinkingly. Her eyes hard as snow, she relents, "Yes, you may keep one or two things. Since you need the memories. But don't try to take more." -45-
Miracles 101
Here is a grain of sand.
Work it into a pearl
That is your first assignment.
Think carefully about your approach. We do give points for the process.
Be elegant, if you can.
(Points are deducted for sloppy work.) Originality
is always encouraged, though not required.
(You won't get extra credit for a squared-off shape or glass-green hue.)
Extensions are granted
on certain occasions
if requested beforehand.
But all work is due by the last day of class. We do not give Incompletes.
We have standards to maintain.
If you must withdraw, do so
by the designated date
which is stated on your syllabus.
Withdrawals will receive a grade of W. The one impossibility
Is receiving no grade at all. Everybody receives a grade at the end. Remember: this is not high school. Remember: no one forced you to take this course. Remember: failure is also an option. -46-
Jack Foley
Jack Foley’s poetry books include Letters/Lights--Words for Adelle , Gershwin, Exiles and Adrift (nominated for a BABRA Award). Foley’s Greatest Hits 1974-2003 (2004) appeared from Pudding House Press, a by-invitation-only series. His critical books include the companion volumes, O Powerful Western Star (winner of the Artists Embassy Literary/Cultural Award 1998-2000) and Foley’s Books: California Rebels, Beats, and Radicals. His radio show, Cover to Cover , is heard every Wednesday at 3:00 p.m. on Berkeley station KPFA and is available at the KPFA web site; his column, "Foley’s Books," appears in the online magazine, The Alsop Review. -47-
An Epithalamium for my Son Sean and his Bride, Kerry Hoke
epithalamium: epi (on, upon) thalamus (bedroom): a song in honor of a bride and bridegroom
What does it mean to be lonely?
What does it mean to be one—that longing?
The world
explains it
as desire for a mate:
find someone get married reproduce consume as much as possible die and if you have problems, solve them
What does it mean to be lonely? Can it be held to
the way one holds to faith or to a marriage?
Is there a lifelong loneliness which no mate can solve
but which nonetheless
animates
and extricates
love—
and
joy.
(What does it mean to be lonely?) There is
another kind of loneliness
which appears initially
to be
sexual
but which cannot
be resolved
by sexuality.
(What does it mean to be lonely?)
There is another kind of loneliness
which is nothing less than
the search for self a search which is finally fruitless, frustrating because selfhood can only be created not found and so uncreates itself continually. It is the search for the self in the other the search for the other in the self -48-
which transcends
the task of pleasure.
What is a marriage?
It is not a union
of two
so that one dissolves in the other but a constant conversation among equals
a constant
interruption
of
loneliness.
It is the creation from two
of one
relationship
It is the search for the self
in the other
the search for the other
in the self
a search which goes on
endlessly
and which fails
endlessly
It is not the end
of loneliness
but the
beginning
of a loneliness
which is like a letter
from a stranger
which suddenly
penetrates your being and makes you say: "I'm not alone" What is loneliness but the realization of selfhood in another of otherness in self which is the beginning of consciousness the beginning of love which has so much of selfhood in it -49-
The ring
is an endless circle
It does not signify
the end of loneliness
but the beginning
of a new, conscious being-in-the-world
It signifies
love
which goes out
and comes back
like a letter from a stranger which, received
is answered
"With all my love."
How can I
say anything
to a son
I have loved
and treasured
throughout his life
except:
be well be conscious be loved don't take
anything I say too seriously To Sean and Kerry we give whatever we can of love and a life lived as well as we could Words— There is no end of loneliness There is no end of love May your children give you the joy that you gave us -50-
The Temptation of Sixty
Story about a mad scientist whose fear of dying impels him to invent a pill which reverses the aging process. On his next birthday, the scientist gets one year younger, not one year older. The difficulty here is that he is still approaching death, only now from the other direction. He knows exactly how many years he has left; he knows the exact day and hour at which he will "die." His new problem is to invent a second pill which will reverse the effects of the first pill and start him aging again. As he ponders this problem, he crosses the street against the light, is hit by a passing truck, and dies immediately. The obituaries list his age inaccurately as 61; he is in fact 59.
the temptation of sixty is to believe
that everything
is possible
and not to believe
that anything
has changed
the temptation of sixty is to justify
behavior
by
delusion
and to justify delusion
by
need
to justify
everything by fiction the temptation of sixty is to believe anything so here we are in Oakland where it’s beginning to rain (east side, west side? in this vast state of California: some little that we hoped for came about something weathered -51-
the deep transitions and adjustments
the anger
of displacement:
some dear thing
lingers in consciousness too many people die such fury
beckons
I slide down
the years
one of those American Flyers from 50 years ago! where is
the mortician on the corner?
where the Elks Club?
here is a rose for it all
here is a stick
I touched in 1949 it was a sword oh, god, do we get it all back including our discontent? your hand (absent) touches my hand (absent) your voice-- do we live the whole thing over? these absences these vanishings these utter-- are how we hold to life -52-
Ginsberg At The Mall
I saw him first eyeing me from Radio Shack pretending to look over electronic equipment
but really wondering what hot stuff he might haunt Since dying, he’d become a chicken hawk
At the DVD store I “accidentally” brushed against him He was surprisingly solid
“Excuse me, Mr. Ginsberg,” I said,
“I thought you were dead.”
“Young man,” he answered, “I am dead”
and then he laughed a big laugh
“You expect me to haunt supermarkets? Or book stores? I try to keep in style.
What’s a nice poetic young man like you with a copy of On the Road in his pocket doing in a place like this?
Wanna see me change?”
What I had seen was the old Ginsberg of the 90s hunched over, professorial, and with that funny squint in his eye. Suddenly he was Hippy Ginsberg
of the 60s—loud, funny, dominant, bearded
He began to sing—badly
(death had not changed that)
until I was afraid that people would notice us but actually no one turned around,
it was as if we couldn’t be heard by anyone
“Hare Krishna!” said Ginsberg, ha ha ha “How about it, kid,
Wanna get laid? You look a little like Neal Cassady
or at least some of you looks like some of him. How about it, you wanna have sex?” “I don’t think so, Mr. Ginsberg. I’ve never had sex with a ghost.” “Nothing to it,” he answered, and suddenly my clothes were off and I had an erection -53-
and I was coming as I’d never come before.
Ginsberg hadn’t touched me,
and he was still standing there fully clothed, laughing.
“How did you do that?” I said.
“It’s just a trick we ghosts have. Pleasure is heaven. Heaven is pleasure. You get me? The Beat Generation, Kerouac said,
that was just a bunch of guys trying to get laid.
In heaven we do it all the time.”
“You’re in heaven?”
“Well, I’m somewhere, and I call it heaven. Even the CIA is there, and all the people they killed. We all get on pretty well together.”
Suddenly he was Professor Ginsberg again. “Same multiple identity,” he said as he vanished
“into air, into thin air”
In my hand was a book whose title was The Posthumous Writings of Allen Ginsberg but as I tried to open the book
its pages withered and vanished.
“You’ll have to wait for that volume,” said Allen’s voice
and he laughed again. “Wouldn’t you like to have that book? You’ll have to write it yoursel—”
Courage teacher, old poet, have you become an owl of wisdom, a hawk of power, a swan of beauty, a sunflower, a leaf, a bit of sunlight, a worm burrowing in the earth?— Have you become —immortal? -54-
Vernon Frazer
Vernon Frazer was born October 2, 1945. He received a B.A. in English from the University of Connecticut and briefly attended graduate school at Simon Fraser University. Frazer's poetry and fiction have appeared in numerous magazines, including AlphaBeat Soup, Blank Gun Silencer, Blue Jacket, Bouillabaisse, First Intensity, Lost and Found Times, Moria, Nebo, , Plain Brown Wrapper, Poetpoetzine, Shampoo, Tempus Fugit, Xtant and many other magazines An interview with Wen Chu-an and several poems were translated into Chinese and appeared in the international journal, Contemporary Foreign Literature. Frazer's books of poetry include A Slick Set of Wheels, Demon Dance, Sing Me One Song of Evolution, Free Fall and Demolition Fedora. Frazer has released five recordings that fuse poetry with jazz: Beatnik Poetry, Haight Street 1985, Sex Queen of the Berlin Turnpike, SLAM! and Song of Baobab. He appeared as guest artist on the late Thomas Chapin’s Menagerie Dreams CD, THE JAZZ VOICE , a compilation of jazz vocalists and poets, and THOMAS CHAPIN--ALIVE, a CD-box set of Chapin's recorded work. Stay Tuned to This Channel, Frazer’s first collection of short fiction, finished as a finalist in the 1996 Black Ice/FC2 Fiction Contest. His newest novel is Relic's Reunions. Frazer introduced IMPROVISATIONS (I-XXIV), his most recent book of poetry, when he read in the Established and Emerging Artists Series at The Poetry Project at St. Mark's Church in Manhattan January 17, 2001. A former program developer and evaluator in the field of human services, Frazer now works as a free-lance writer. -55-
Nice People
They're out there. I can hear them chirping like birds at the feeder.
Day after day
they have only good things to say
Jennifer's job Jason's school play aerobics
class, the MBA program to help them stay ahead
like nice people.
Here
in my troglodyte's cave I rave because
they're out there.
I can hear them gibbering, gerbils nibbling their giblets like nice people. The smattering that starts them chattering so brightly slights my appetite. How unsightly my hunger must seem to them. I'm surly? Surely. I'm not like nice people. -56-
I'm strange to them for wanting & finding them wanting for not wanting to test the festering flesh a life-grip beyond the modest morsels they claim for themselves like nice people as they block the way to my hunger just because they're out there. -57-
The Sex Queen Of The Berlin Turnpike
"coulda been
Little Miss Rich Bitch layin' on my yacht"
but claimed her father left
his inheritance behind
when the Mob's hitmen climbed
his trail. So,
she's the doe-eyed darling of the clipjoints
on the Strip. She flashes her tits for tips from bikers & lonely old men
in glasses
steamed with dreams of what never was.
Her nectarine nipples
tease me, her buns swing the breeze that sucks up my buck
on her wake
of chestnut hair. She feeds my fantasies
the way I feed her lost wealth---what I can afford to give. But she still lives bitter,
broke, strung out on coke in neon turnpike motels & runs out on the rent. While I listen to her story to escape from my own she pays back the memories of her father. -58-
The Boy With Green Hair
My earliest memory,
at three: crying after this movie because I wanted green hair.
But I couldn't remember why the story made me cry with envy. What would I see when I replayed the cable connecting me to
the Boy With Green Hair? A parallel destiny?
Or just a kid dreaming his own uniqueness, his follicles shrieking
to bloom some favorite color from days so black & white then, so colorized now?
The dyed green hair I'd cried to have was brown, nearly black, & thick, nearly like mine. But a sheen, an aura, even
a halo hovered above it.
The Boy With Green Hair
shunted from family to family
while his mother and father rescued World War II War Orphans overseas & finally
to Charlie, a caring guy who couldn't dull the razors of ridicule slashing the Boy With Green Hair on the playgrounds or, worse, the wound of discovering his parents had died helping children now just like him. The Boy With Green Hair -59-
transformed my flicker of memory
into some small foreshadowing of destiny. A domestic war destroyed my family.
For years I shunted from mom to dad,
an afterthought wishing for
an Uncle Charlie while the kids in school tore at the aura
my head fluttered and jerked.
The Boy With Green Hair
became a poster boy
for War Orphans. Forty-six years after crying at three a diagnosis makes me the Boy With Green Hair of Tourette Syndrome & a role model for the other untouchables in America's classless society. The dye will look greener against my gray, anyway. -60-
A Sporting Affair
One & the same to me, she said,
knowing the hold she had on me. I tried
again, tried to explain the boxer throws real punches, knows real pain ---but keeps his dignity in defeat
while the wrestler fakes his holds, fakes his pain---but takes humiliation as his beating.
I tried
to make her see the difference
between us. But her crossed arms blocked the cross of my pride. She choked my bleating
throat, pile-drived my heart into my head & threw me out of the ring. Bleeding, I cried, You just proved you like wrestling better. One & the same to me, she said. -61-
A hipster's hipster
born and bred
in his mirror's glance Brooke fled
to Paris
to peddle his ass stuffed with phalluses of hash
through customs
to prove he could move with Burroughs
the Great Beat Legend. He came home to flaunt his vicarious fame. He came home to fold his master's voice into the great first novel strangled on Old Bull's cold umbilical and peddled his ass to the Aircraft, a phoenix of the factory underground. -62-
Shana's Going To Disney World!
blast the banners swarming past me, pinker than the St. Louis dawn, pinker than the ruffles
on the five year old bouncing
out of place in the Terminal.
Who cares who's going where
when you've gone two days without sleep! Who cares about this Queen
for a Minute the Network Wagon Train circles to save for the Six O’clock News!
She'd be a princess at twenty, anyway. Her joy overflows the cameras
that try to contain her. And her
few blond filaments---how few,
I notice---raise the morning gold.
I reach back, remember my cobalt-bare scalp, remember the last roots of life
salting my mother's chemo-stripped crown and the hospital's coast-to-coast call last night. The dike of my voice cracks with tears and a shutter. I can't tell Shana's mother why I pay her my five-dollar tribute to the sun cheated out of noon. -63-
A Slick Set Of Wheels
We kill time on the curb
across from the club with our slow J, watching life pass us by
like a slick set of wheels,
like the slick set of wheels parked here to parade its owner's fast pace:
V-8 with virgin pink lacquer,
the cornersand gritting the teeth of tread sneering fresh.
We wonder if the polished dude so proud of it wears a turtleneck, a medallion & manicured nails.
What a place to park his boast, so close, so bravely in our faces. We kill time on the curb long enough to watch old beer-bellied T-shirt sag near our feet, crank up, change into old tires & burn out. -64-
The Sane
are always
with us, the poor
bastards that we are. The sane
appease us,
try, to please us,
their patience, our patience. The sane try their balanced lives to balance the rage with which we eat our skins. Their condescending kindness is the madness we measure with our attacks. The sane are always with us, the poor bastards. -65-
Kirpal Gordon
Kirpal Gordon was born March 14, 1952. He graduated magna cum laude from Fordham University, receiving a B.A. in Philosophy and Religious Studies. He earned an M.F.A. in Creative Writing from the University of Arizona. At the Naropa Institute in 1978, he did a summer poetry apprenticeship with Allen Ginsberg. His most recent books of poetry and fiction include Love in Sanskrit, Poems 2001-1978, Jazz Tales from the Ghost Realms and Because the Jewel Is in the Lotus. He works as a writer and a literary consultant. -66-
Puberty/Colonialism/Spring
In the beginning it was only a puppy: eager, awkward, anxious to please.
But denial carried a tight collar. Hard luck & weird fears threw but a few scraps. Still it swelled. Pressures folded its virgin skin into a bitter mockery while the bark of its posed heroism revealed the whip’s clumsy stump, a hesitation hammer’s stuttering.
Only after the blood-clot, tongue-twisted cover-up & broken-boweled final hope snuffed out that the animal locked inside might ever breath deeply its adulthood, the weeping of defeat became teeth whose flood no muscle nor mental maneuver could restrain: teeth to rip out the guts that held it back for so long in simpering obedience & crying out loud at its own birth confessed its confusion to its master why do you treat me like this? I only get bigger. -67-
Turning the Curved World
When edges in a summer bedroom soften & curvaceous shapes wound round an eye like a mast that sailor was lashed to while sirens sang the sorrow of the sea, watch him wonder why the woman he’s just kissed goodbye remains within him.
From a cabin’s oval window in a birch grove she waves but when he retreats to a backyard chair she’s there before him saying see how every seen thing bends & rolls. Reels of hills hum & beyond shaded pine limb, something falls, a call into the woods & he hears how every sound folds within the hollow of his earlobe. Even when he reckons elk across the low mist love calling, they’re invisible. Coitus has turned the curved world inside out.
On the oak deck he left behind him: pant of bloodhound, patter of cat paw. Dancing at meadow’s edge sound’s imperceptible body surrounds every intrusion--- shot of gun, whoosh of wings---sewing his eardrum into an open lesion, like the woman before him saying let’s go round again. Into the forest then: flicker of laurel leaf, silk of spider web, fountain & mountain flowing in reverse direction. Like the knowledge of being here for thousands of years meeting the sound of falling off the edge of the world, a scream muted by the lull of sunlight in a clearing: every hole in space fills in with space! How can he admit the terror? The whole world is feminine. -68-
Appearances
At the threshold of enfleshment no one need remind us: Osiris gets ripped apart to be born again. So we’re putting in a few appearances, swirling in the whirlwind, seeking out Great Round’s rickety rattle of rock-scissors-stones, ghosts & old bones, scat-rattlin’ earthquake’s shakedown to a trail underground.
When club lights dim our mistress of ceremonies begins & as she opens the curtain we see for certain the soul’s seven bodies. We know whatever’s left of us is making pilgrimage to Benares or Luxor, a turn toward Mecca or the Other Shore, the shining grace of our original face we may no longer be able to recall.
So we lit our last incense stick when we saw that naked woman’s shadow slip through a door in the garden’s old adobe wall, the smoking wicks of our votive candles carrying in their wake the smell of autumn leaves ablaze to remind us the circle’s complete, even if we struggle with the coat’s fur lining.
Though we can’t forget the ones we’ve loved, how sun shafts slid through woods to fleck their flesh in leafy shadow, fire’s consolation sings the truth we finally are: error burned up, embers’ witness to the spin of a small planet, scarecrow & a yellow moon, pretty soon the carnival on the edge of town; king harvest has surely come. -69-
Big Ol’ No One
The mystics have long insisted that God is not an-Other Being; they have claimed that he does not really exist and that it is better to call him Nothing.
---Karen Armstrong, A History of God
Because water reveals the Way in its race downhill as it cleaves to decay, draws on its rush to the sea grief to free the element of rust sleeping in every wintering thing, who knows god’s a Big Ol’ No One & the sorrow that hides in the folds of her flesh, sorrow that shakes free when she sings, tells us the Fat Lady is the Grim Reaper indeed.
Because life & self are up for grabs---why we got it or it’s got us, who can say?---but to hear the call to prayer across the conquered plain, the longing to belong fills us with a Great Big Nothing. We know the finale’s scripted in before we begin, that time tricks us into the quest to become only to end up betraying the joy just to be.
Because death is no surprise guest but waits around every corner & cliché this no-count neighborhood offers, we wish not to list the men on corners packing pistols, but to say instead to No One have mercy, please. As snow falls & earth hardens we can still hear his skin bursting through the love she shared with him in April gardens. Because in ecstasy names of gods may have escaped his lips, he’s glad she’s never held it against him. -70-
How Paint Peels: Petals on a Wet White Wall
The apparition of these faces in the crowd, / Petals on a wet, black bough.
---Ezra Pound, “In a Station of the Metro”
From a second story window a garden wall in the woods could be mistaken for a gray December sky but for its border of black framing this fast approach of dusk. Spots of white on a dust-gray coat mean a starling, mean winter’s coming, the arrival of night. He opens the window to throw pellets of bread, landing around birds like flakes of snow---white against white in the trance of twilight---drawing the paint peeling off that partition into apparitions of the faces he has loved, petals flying in memory’s dark sky until they dawn on that wet, white wall. Woman he wants to say birth me a form to know the real you in, a me free of framing your impression, a you beyond my hallucination. Having kept each woman waiting until only their memory remains, in memory alone they remain: a fallen snow, a starling’s broken wing,
a layer of white that washes into a wall. Chilled, he closes the window to let birds do what birds will while he turns a paperweight upside down to rain that miniature Manhattan world with snowflakes as pleasing as a lost lover’s laughter.
Could he enter that bubble he’d know love has no end but to lie with love again, his own passion blasting everything glass encases outward in jolts of no-wall, just-sky, pure-snow & let-fly: bricks & mortar will follow like row houses claiming the skyline (mine mine mine) to repeat how stubborn the struggle & how layered the washes as his fingers peck at the mirrored pane. Lost within his own mistaken notions, he can’t -71-
tell push from pull, up from down, the face of a lover from a wall in the woods; a bird in hand from two in the bush, obsession from a determination steadfast as any sun’s winter address: to begin again. -72-
Enrich Your Vocabulary Now
Busted
What’s bum but a word the mouth casts out, spoken without the need of teeth or tongue. Bum: a hole in a human face only a bottle can reach.
What’s homeless victim but a double trochee, a lyric phrase to separate them that got from them that not while keeping expanding catastrophes at bay. Homeless: an off rime to Om, Jesus. Victim: an in-road to system.
What’s rat but ribs & grease, antenna nose, little pink feet whose offspring squeeze through the tunnels humans leave when the city they’ve built begins to decay. Rat: a fink; or raton: what’s left when a species starts to eat its own.
Broken
Betrayed by his own anatomy, William would be Ms. Billie. Sweet like the night, a gardenia, ‘cause prison’s rule book needn’t spell it out: a rule requires an enforcer, “did you say force her?”
In my solitude he-she sings sick & trembling, voice quivering.
You taunt me as protection waits to be paid stammering in State-issue green rage. With memories of getting locked out, boxed in, knocked up, head bleeding. That never die. The birth of the blues is a woman behind bars weeping. -73-
Open
Polysyllabic. A well kept secret. Like the man said, it can ruin your whole day. To get there at all you’ve got to be looking. You won’t find Arthur Kill Correctional Facility easily. The only road out there first has to pass the largest landfill dump in the world. Breathe deeply. Inside Arthur Kill the women who work up front chew gum & worry about their weight. Though prison encircles them, issues about race gender poverty & class haven’t caused a violent reaction yet. They’re (nouns) civil servants overworked, understaffed, grade 5 state salary (what the inmates call chump change), an hourly rate that begets forgetfulness & keeps certain facts away-- -like let’s say after they (verbs) punch out, make dinner for the kids, phone their ex for the check never sent---they go back the next morning to (nouns in the plural) 800 men whose lives of crime they file & re-file 8 hours a day, 50 weeks a year, 20 years ‘til tired, dead or retired. Those (nouns in the singular) men get lonely for love.
Once in awhile worlds will collide. A convict on the porter crew, just a kid doing a skid bid (down long enough to worry about the softness of a woman’s skin) looks up from his mop & pail. In the accident that two panicked glances make (beyond the fear thatharm-hatred-shame-&-blame will be exchanged), there by the copy machine, they pause that extra second to witness (adjectives) the same, slow, tender, undeniable need to love & be loved in a face beneath a busy bee-hived, beauty parlored hair-do, in a
face below an ordered corn row concealed by a red du-rag. Arthur no one knows who Arthur is, was or will be. Kill (verb) or in Dutch a stream though there is no stream, only factory -74-
backwater, ancient hulls rising when the tide ebbs.
Correctional (euphemism) implying a moral order somewhere.
Facility exactly what is taken away.
Meanwhile barges of garbage warm up in the sun, waiting to break open an engineer’s idea of how much waste can be contained. Strike out for love? Poison the air? Locate what we’ve been told isn’t there? Let’s just say dying to enrich our vocabulary. -75-
Schuyler Hoffman
Schuyler Hoffman was born May 8, 1947. He attended Bard College and the University of Massachusetts at Boston, where he received his B.A. He holds a Doctorate in Clinical Psychology from the Massachusetts School of Professional Psychology. He has published two chapbooks of poetry: Words In A Foreign Language and The Spaces Between, and has recorded a compact disc, Sacrifice, in collaboration with the musician Richard Atwood. Magazine publications include Coast2Coast and The Cafe Review. He performs his poetry around eastern Massachusetts and lives in Gloucester, Massachusetts. -76-
Figures Within Figures
--- Red Painting by Therese Kovach
Two Figures Many Figures Figures within figures Lakes within Oceans Green within Blue Purple Jazz in Background Orange sunset nocturnal Playland Prism Fragmented Fragments Purple and Green Within You Hold
the Frame and Dance while the Piano plays balladlike in background and the ceiling fan scent of fog spins through Pale Blue center water reflecting orange- hued sunset purple charcoal clouds and -77-
seagulls call the colors shadow
the figures as they stand multiply dialogue with each other
thought balloons prismatic reflections a NeoCubist Experience! filtered through Pollock's pourings the shifting images effervescent in the mind's eye and heart soul song as the music extends time into eternity Now -78-
Blues for Jimi
feet planted the bass beat drops down
under the tears never cried Lord Lord Lord
one with the music riffs fly circle and spin back a hollow sound emptiness inside the music sway gently feel down the beat steps into the where nothing is inside the music circular returns repeats the Hallelujah devotion only angels can afford -79-
DOUBLE VISION
SEE DOUBLE RED BLUE IN THE LIGHT OF ANOTHER YELLOW GREEN REFLECTION ROCK PAPER SCISSORS
BLUE RED
LOST WORLD
PARALLEL LINES THE BALL BOUNCES BACK AND FORTH
LOOK AT THE MOON
PURPLE CAROM VIOLET BLUE THE WAVELETS OFF THE WALL
TWO FIGURES RUN ACROSS A FIELD
CLEAR GREEN YELLOW OUTLINE GOLD SHARP SHARD
ONE IS THE SHADOW OF THE OTHER
EVERYDAY OCHRE BROWN RUSSET AS DEFINED
A HAWK SWEEPS CLOSE TO EARTH
ORANGE RED BLURRY ROSE DEFORMED STRIVES TO JOIN THE OTHER IMAGE FUZZY MERGE PINK VIOLET CERULEAN SOFT AND COLORFUL ROCK PAPER SCISSORS LOOK AT THE MOON ULTRAMARINE READ AQUA OLIVE FOREST ROOTED THE SIGNS THE WORDS LOST VIRIDIAN APPARENCIES -80-
COBALT BLACK IN THE LIGHT OF SIENNA THE ETERNAL THE DAY APPEARS OCHRE FORMED
WAIT
KNOW THEM
SEPIA VERMILION
I WALK THROUGH THE TUNNEL IN THE HILLSIDE CARMINE TABLES LAUNDRY ROSE RED
AND THERE YOU ARE COMING TOWARDS ME FOCUS SHUTTER YELLOW GREEN CADMIUM FEELING SOFT AND COLORFUL
I CANNOT READ THE SIGNS
LEMON CANARY
THE LIGHT SUBWAY ORANGE PINK ROCK PAPER SCISSORS HARD RED AT THE EDGE AMONG QUALITIES SCARLET BODY PERCEPTION IN LINE REFLECTION LAVENDER PURPLE REACH THROUGH ROSE LOOK AT THE MOON THE LAYERS BLUE BLACK THE THOUGHT BOUNCES BACK AND FORTH -81-
THE FLESH FIELDS GREEN
ONE MERGES WITH ANOTHER SEPARATE WHITE
ROCK PAPER SCISSORS
AM I BLACK
LOOK AT THE MOON PURPLE OR MERGED ROOTED
BEIGE PROTRUDING THROUGH WHICH SEE DOUBLE WALK RED BLUE UNSTABLE IN THE LIGHT OF ON BALANCE ANOTHER MOVING ANIMAL YELLOW GREEN REFLECTION MOVING ACROSS THE TERRITORY OCHRE BROWN RUSSET AS DEFINED REMEMBERS HOME -82-
In Motion out of Time
dream lover flourish stepchild dance back belong
forever and ever
now and one piece of ass one piece of ass
dancing out of time
in motion / emote
thrill pace chop and chill
up and down the spine rivulets run
high stepping sun
under the sun another one to be born lovelorn
and forgotten
dance / stop
emotion to
hillside valley mountaintop
ocean
she is a star
dark as sin cathedral
trance touching dignity forsake not
one more time dark eyes
not one more time ripe thighs not one more time will she come to me rippling waters pour out splash down stone stairs and dance chance meeting surrender to where there are and more ripple cranked in / to volcano baby trash bin -83-
triple heap header and pipe dream Flanders fields across the water darkness reigns -84-
Beyond the Curve peering thru grey shock of sick green puke yellow rents in fabric cover wavers remnants sing black hawk fish eye unformed image stops the music wavers on threshold of dream world in memoriam Jackson Pollock -85-
where are we
in the rippling
strange attractor
rattle death vibrato
steel gray battleship sky
wall of sound wah wah pedal
feedback screams gawky rhythmic horn
solo review of past life flash forward
instantaneous polaroid porn print courage
fast car fuselage insane with alcohol
haze maniacal drive fast forward into eternity
already beyond the curve the darkness no longer
afraid still driven moon crescent figures contend
converge from all over space into habitation paint
musical chorus loving thick viscous glue boat sails
onward dark gray sea gray blue gray black gray white gray bubbles float effervesce on water pouring down all at
once cascade dance foot to hand to eye to guitar to waves of paint gray clouds torn reveal organs flesh anatomy of fear dream crash clash of chaos crescendo scream ultimate apotheosis vision everyday chime resolved vertiginal -86-
Zombieville
I live for long stretches of tundra time in Zombieville - sleepwalking down the commuter highway - I want I want - I need I need - there is no conclusion
until whatever ends - ends - the highway seductive in its glissando anomie - numb voiceless and errant - the errors proclaim - emptiness triumphs like stacked sheets of paper waiting to be Xeroxed - it's all being copied and recopied replication DNA and RNA sexual couplings in test tubes there is no fertility in the fertility rites the children are murdered before they can be conceived - we are - what we are - what are we but cannibals - feeding off the lost souls who wander through our offices - who wander thru our selves who do not wander but plod mercilessly - the human realm reduced to machine robotics hyper cyber spaces that don't exist anywhere we have entered the mind of electronic quanta - we are herded by shepherds of awesome technology - we have been handed platitudes and hunch - we are nowhere not even here - the person fictive I believe I am is not anything but illusion a shimmering conception like conceptions of space as Space - it doesn't exist there is no there there or here here where it all falls in on itself and collapses into maudlin sentimentalities of oh poor me self pity and racking tensions in my neck and throat - I speak in platitudes - in monotones - I speak in echoes
in reverberations like a shadow cast by the voice of my interlocutor - I do not exist as Rimbaud said I is other - I am not my self or A Self I am fiction the pain is real is momentary passes like a truck on the highway to cyberspace information is a tidal wave consuming the whole civilization like a giant garbage dump there is no difference between one thing and another plug in tune on tune out the real is a fiction nowhere is here where we are and we
can't grasp it it is our own condition we can't see it because we are lost in a woods of words and images reconstructions of the machinery of repression of manufacturing ideologies and mass entertainment the big land grab has transformed itself into a media pyramid the pharaohs sit at the apex with their blind A-seeing eye and gorge themselves with the wishes and aspirations of
all the children to be just like them to grow up to be Cindy Crawford or Michael Jordan or Madonna of the crossroads there is no way out of the madness we are all possessed by and mostly deluded into the worst madness of all believing we are not crazy that nothing is wrong that suicides happen because of chemical imbalances that the brain is the seat of the mind and there is no difference my headache has moved into my neck and my whole body is about to vomit out civilization I don't believe in anything anymore there is no hope there is no illusion there is no such thing as human understanding or love is just a four letter word my teenage dreams die hard I'm fifty years old and still trying to grow up to see things the way they really are and it seems impossible because it just keeps changing mutating and getting appropriated by media moguls so we stand on shifting sand for a limited time and wonder when and if there's any more to it than what we see thru veils of illusion the webs of Maya the Maya of iconic sadness music masterpieces of ecstatic longing pain and unbearable grief the colors of paintings we gaze at for a few minutes before lapsing back onto the highway of living death thru Zombieville -87-
Bob Holman
Bob Holman was born March 10, 1948. He received his Bachelor's degree from Columbia University. He studied poetry with Ted Berrigan and Alice Notley at the St. Mark's Poetry Project, and studied acting at the Neighborhood Playhouse and the Open Theater. A tireless poetry advocate, Holman's many activities included serving as Co- Director and Slam Host at the Nuyorican Poets Cafe, and producing the PBS series The United States of Poetry . His most recent books of poetry are Beach Simplifies Horizon and The Collect Call of the Wild. In addition to promoting and supporting numerous activities that increase the public's awareness and appreciation of poetry, Holman teaches Writing and Integrated Arts at Bard College. His internet web site is www.bobholman.com.
-88-
We Are the Dinosaur
Blast open the gates to kingdom come Whoops what happened to everyone Planted a seed -- Grew into a gun
Dum de dum dum dum dum dum dumb
Life is a riot livin in a cartoon
Ice-age in a dumpster - that's our living room Set fire to your roof - get a better view Global warmin is a warnin - toodle-oo
We are the dinosaur
We don't live here anymore
We got what we were askin for Follow the dinosaur
Ho ho homo sapiens Ain't so smart
Ka ka kamikazi, Friend Which way is the ark?
The world is dialin 911
The don't walk sign just changed to you better run What we are waiting for has long since come Dum-de-dum dum dumm dum dum
Cross the scorchin sands with my big fat feet It's hard becomin diesel fuel with nothin to eat Better catch us quick - we're outta here
We're pre-winged birds & tend to disappear
We are the dinosaur
We don't live here anymore
We got what we were askin for Follow the dinosaur
Hurry, disappear! Back to the Past!
Did you really think the Future was gonna last? It's endin with a bang so let's have a blast
Let's dine cannibal - it makes a nice contrast
Chauffeured ambulances race to the prom
Santa, please bring me a neutron bomb Recycle the planet before the earth is a grave But please excuse me -- I gotta get back to my cave We are the dinosaur We don't live here anymore We got what we were askin for Follow the dinosaur -89-
FIRE: Friend or Foe?
Once
A long long time
Ago
Once upon a time ago
As a matter of fact
Just a second ago
In the beginning
Back to the beginning
Just before the beginning
It was shhh
I'm a-talkin quiet and peace
A riot of quiet
Can you hear it? C'mon try it
You can't hear it? Well that's quiet
Shh Mmmm Bzzz
Didja hear that? In the distance
The insects were buzzing
A language of verbs
& I'm talking
I'm a-talking
I'm a-talking talking bzz-bzz
Little mosquitos
In the ear bzz
Verbosely verbing
Bzzing? Amazing!
Re: "verb"-erating
Suddenly yet subtlely
A luminous lucidity
In the inner inner ear's inner sanctity
The bzz gives way - something's trying to say The bzz clears
& now you hear
Fire! Fire! -
Fire: Friend or Foe?
A friend (& I use the term advisedly) A friend once remarked
(Which is rare, in that friends Usually remark twice --
(Sometimes I think that's the mark of a friend -- The second remark... Sometimes I think that's the mark of a friend -- The...)) Fire! Fire! Fire: Friend or Foe? These days with Death so fresh So deep, so near-at-hand -90-
You feel infected as a Youth As if there's no Future
That's not polluted
No Past but what's retributed Nothing to say
Cept "Throw it away!"
Add it to the Great Garbage Heap Where we sit so gently, my Love
& I, discussing the Forms in the Sky & like as not, as our toes get toasty & we look below at the rolly coasty
Lands ablaze like a big gas barbecure Searing the flesh o' the earth
Well, that's when we start to reflect on Such as this:
Fire! (we start) Fire! Fire!
Fire: Friend or Foe?
Fire! (yes, that's how we start) Fire! Fire! Fire: Friend or Foe?
Because really we don't know
And as we thus sit thusly
Awaiting the returns of civilization
To answer our small queries
Concerning the Nature of Nature
And Harnessing Destruction and Alternative Alternatives Until our red hot lips meet
And we make all kinds of passion
Sweet, nasty, hasty, taster,
Flooozy & wicked, bastard prick and Putting the left-overs in a Tupperware container Of course because we know nothing lasts forever Anyway, except nothing lasts forever Even the thought of Fire, even Fire itself, Even Fire: Friend or Foe? -91-
Love Poems I love poems Principal Reason I am in love with you I want to rub feet in bed Please invent beds Because of You Everything is you Especially our children Please pay the rent Night Fears Everyone is in love Except you -92-
Levitating in Levittown (Rock'N'Roll re-Revival)
Start with a virgin Bloody Mary & a French toast Host Breakfast w/ Champions & the Holy Ghost
Holy guacamole & a Papal Bull roast
Get on yr knees so yr disease can be diagnosed
Don't slosh it w/ the sherpas to some Himalayan height Visit our heavy-hittin' Tibetan, his 3rd eye's out of sight! Be careful yr not blinded by his clear white light
On a toot w/ the Absolute? The price is right!
Levitating in Levittown
All the gurus are getting down
Get a mighty holy high from a roly-poly holy Gonna save yr soul! Gonna steal yr dough!
Brethren & Cistern!
You only live once, so why not make it forever?
Yes! It's always Sunday at the Levittown Holy Hallelujah Rock'n' Rollin' ReRevival Cathedral Spa!
Thrill to personal appearances by: the Three Kings, The 10 Commandments, the 12 Apostles, the 2486 Bodhisattvas & for one night only - the 9 Billion Names of God!
Come on down to our Holy Hallelujah Hell of Fame & see all-time Champ Jesus Christ Himself defend His Crown of Thorns against that promising young heavyweight, Elvis the King...
Yes, act now & receive absolutely free for 15.95 postage & handling costs, a rare psychedelic relic: a genuine Plastic Splinter from the Cross; you'll also receive a thrilling
3D Holy "Winking" Hologram of the Lord (autograph only 2.95 extra); as an added bonus we'll include the Amazing Resurrection Plant - you can't kill it, no matter how hard
you try! &, for a limited time only - Readers Digest Condensed Books present in fifty pages or less: The Bible!
& for your late-nite ecstasy, get way down at our Traditional Holy Hop, a moment of shared experience in the flesh with all your favorite gurus, Mother Superiors & Father Inferiors, the Flock's in the Foal for God's Rock'n'Roll -
So Rev it up, reverend - saving your Soul has never been so Goddamn much fun - & remember - it's never too late to start all over!
It's Soul-a-matic Time! A chance like this may not come your way for another 2,000 years - So bring the whole family & slouch on down towards Levittown! -93-
Amen Awomen & a one two three... Gotta rock'n'rolling holy rolling re-Revival Born Again Again! Born Again Again! Gotta rock'n'rolling holy rolling re-Revival Born Again Again! Born Again Again! -94-
After Li Po
No oar but this magnolia
No boat but this spicewood
Carve a jade flute, make it gold Make it beautiful as this bottle of wine Make the bottle a woman Make me a king on an empty hill I'm so full of wine and poetry Laughing, my pen falls down, Ending this poem Now it can bring me wealth and fame! -95-
Dream of Allen Ginsberg, Oct 15, 1997, Berlin
Allen has red hair, I can’t tell if it’s dyed or a wig. We’re sitting in a cozy farmhouse in the Alps, talking and drinking tea, talk talk talk.
We go out to set up highway cones behind the house in a clearing up the mountain a bit. The highway cones are Uncle Sam hats and American flags.
Back to the house, more talking. Then, looking up, a Volkswagen van drifts by, banks, lands, using markers as a landing field.
An older couple gets out, greet Allen warmly. They ignore me, so I slip into the van. The man leans in and says to me, “It’s a boat, too.” -96-
Mikhail Horowitz
Mikhail Horowitz was born in 1950 and attended the State University of New York at New Paltz. He has performed his poetry and comedy at the Village Gate, the Taos, New Mexico Heavyweight Poetry Championships and at numerous colleges and clubs. He is the author of Big League Poets and The Opus of Everything in Nothing Flat. His poetry has appeared in small press journals such as Exquisite Corpse, City Lights Journal and Long Shot. A selection of his poetry appeared in The Outlaw Bible of American Poetry. His performance work is available on two CDs, The Blues of the Birth and Live, Jive, & Over 45, and is excerpted on three anthology CDs, including Bring It On Home. He currently works as an editor in the publications office at Bard College. -97-
September 11, 2001
Moon dust patinas an abandoned
police car. A search dog collapses, overwhelmed by the stench of so
much flesh. Gleaming for just a moment
in morning sunlight, a man and a woman
hold hands as they drop from the 80th floor. What’s left of a wheelchair smolders; what’s left of a face is shrouded by faxes. Miles away, a blizzard of trading sheets papers the streets of Brooklyn. On CNN, Yasser Arafat donates blood. And two days later, at the bottom of a crushed pile of rubble, a cell phone continues to ring.
Entombed in debris at the bottom of
this bad dream, someone answers the phone. The caller is a multitude—a weeping ghost of Hiroshima, a walking skeleton of Auschwitz,
a starving girl in an African refugee camp, a Belfast mother who’s lost both sons to car bombs, and two dead schoolboys, one Israeli, one Palestinian. They all begin talking at once, yet every word is clear as a flowing stream. -98-
T'ang Fragment
to be clear and crazy, like
those ancient Taoist sages, those
wild Chinese minds in hairy mountains —feisty as crows, abrasive as cicadas, fording the roar in muddied garments, brushing impossible peaks & riled skies with deceptively simple poems, honking back to wacky geese & happily guzzling plum wine— -99-
the return
separated from the larger cycles
by economics politics religion even art
it is thus a bittersweet blessing to watch these battered pacific salmon thrashing reseeding degraded beds to the shrill threnody of gluttonous gulls & the immemorial gloom of giant cedars towering trunks impossibly thick with listening -100-
Wood Flute & after he's blown it it's driftwood gnarled & polished by his channeling breath notched by longing scored by loss weathered by echoes of distant places relic of a voyage not its own -101-
Miles High
Miles high, they sip coffee, read Newsweek Fortune Times ignoring clouds
But not so the woman in 15E, seated next to me
She's reading The Watchtower, and every so often sighs, looks up,
looks past me, out the window into radiant cloudscape Somewhere over Michigan she has to pee
Gets up, meets my eye, deliberately places the 'zine on the seat
between us, nods, & heads for the head
But I'm engrossed in Peter Ackroyd's biography of William Blake, so
she's wasting her time in this neck of forever
And as I read that every Space smaller than a Globule of Mans blood
opens into Eternity of which this vegetable Earth is but a shadow
I look out through the eye into the clouds, and they are water in its Spiritual form: not tyrants crown'd but great Cerebral treetops;
the Thoughts, multifarious and giant, in Blake's head And I take her copy of The Watchtower, tenderly return it to her seat And God, so long worshipp'd, departs as a lamp without oil, or this tablet of Alka-Seltzer into froth. -102-
Return Flight
Lifted in an instant, exalted over all these other lives
Permitted to rove where grounded eye cannot
Delving into junipered ravines, wending endless roads engraved in
dust
Bronchial arroyos, synaptic canyons
Miles of bleached highway veining ancient ceramic landscapes, leading
to isolate clusters of tiny houses
Specks of domesticity as lonely as burial stones
Sun makes of gray lakes a sudden efflorescence, alchemical gold Skein of illuminated lakes, the strewn jewelry of tribal giants Drinking water from a plastic cup, looking at clouds through plastic
window
And clouds in right eye: the streamers of blood imposing their dance,
a fluctuant sarabande, upon the sky
So dancing eye a part of what it sees
Not separate from the uncountable dots of fire, eyes of gazing lakes
& watchful ponds
Every particle of dust, wrote Blake, breathes forth its joy
Baby across the aisle, prominent blue vein in pink head, a river in Terra's head now seen from sky And black businessman, his dozing noggin on shoulder of passenger next to him Dreaming, The white man's finally learned to fly -103-
spider flies united
is that really a
spider at 37000 feet
on flight 90 out
of portland, navigating the various tactilities of carry-on luggage, hungry mote of hairy sunlight, ticklish intelligence on the octagonal qui vive? same spider, perhaps, who spun them skeins below, those intricate threadings of riverbed & interstate, webs of tillage & linkage of steeple & tree, observing her work through curves of a pressurized window, strung out on her own ingenuity — -104-
Poem after the endless snowfall, at blue dusk in a sky pale gray at its western edges, the evening star so icy & imperishable, an earring for the seraph of pure silence, or the last flake, never to fall -105-
Metropolitan Museum what I most cherish about the wild cursive script of the loopy monk Tuai-su is how his drunken black characters vibrant & vigorous so thoroughly whelm the faint official seals 4 / 5 /96 One Treasure of Imperial China -106-
1.
poem & commentary
sit, monk,
at brink of the falls
breathe the peace engendered by this violence.
2.
The falling water is no more "violent"
than the breathing of the monk is "peaceful." These are useless distinctions, more distracting than the cataract. Sit. Breathe. The brink is where you are, at any given moment. Laugh or cry, you are already swept away. -107-
Arthur Winfield Knight
Arthur Winfield Knight was born December 29, 1937. He earned an M.F.A. with Honors in Creative Writing at San Francisco State University. He and his wife Kit were co- editors of The Unspeakable Visions of the Individual, a highly-regarded journal of Beat Generation literature and scholarship. His recent publications include the novels Blue Skies Falling and Johnny D. His most recent collection of poetry is Outlaw Voices. He is a free-lance writer. -108-
The Mysteries of the Universe
Middle-aged men
in tattered T-shirts line the street,
dead leaves fluttering down on them.
They peer beneath the upraised hoods of their pickup trucks, their obscene bellies bulging. Bent over, they cannot hear the terrible voices of their wives. It is a form of prayer. A kind of penance. They have spent half a lifetime in this position. -109-
Wild Turkeys
They arrive at dawn,
coming in groups of 10 or 20, hovering beneath the white birch in the gray light. We throw them ragged chunks of white bread, delighted. The birds coo.
“I used to think they gobbled,” my wife says. The females
lean forward, pecking
at the bread, at the hard earth. Balance is all. The silly males preen, spreading their wings. We can see the birds’ nests in the great oaks behind our house. Each night the turkeys levitate into the highest branches, reappearing at dawn. -110-
The Hitchhiker
I hitchhiked to Reno the first time I came west, then I caught a ride on a slow freight. It was spring and the aspens were turning yellow as we crossed the Sierra- Nevada Mountains. Everything was bursting into bloom and I knew my life was going to be different, that I was going to open up to experience in new ways. There was something magical waiting for me in the Golden Land, and I waved at people wearing red and green lumberjack shirts as I passed through little towns like Truckee and Emigrant Gap and they waved back madly. I sat there in that boxcar, my legs dangling over the side like a dipsy doodle as the train swooped down into the Great Central Valley. We crossed a huge elevated trestle west of Sacramento. Down below, the rice paddies were flooded, and you could see the clouds reflected in the water like great finger paintings. It was dusk when the train piled into San Francisco. Neon signs winked on across the city as if they were welcoming me, and I did a little dance, jumping up into the air and clicking my heels together like a beat Charlie Chaplin, as I skipped across the railroad yard in the purple twilight. I knew I was finally home. -111-
James Dean: Walking on Water
I tell people
“I can walk on water,” then I leap into the air, pumping my feet madly, hovering over the pool. It’s a mad world
I seem to be walking across water for a second, two seconds but it’s an illusion. Magic. People shout, “Jesus, Jimmy,” needing miracles. Me, too, sinking. Like a lost pilgrim, I beat my way back toward the surface. Toward the light. -112-
James Dean: Bullfrogs
My father tried to raise bullfrogs with six legs,
but nobody bought them. They were strange creatures with gelatinous bodies
and watery yellow eyes. No one had seen anything like them. Our Baptist neighbors claimed they were an abomination to God and they’d sneak into our yard at night, stomping on the frogs. In the morning we’d find their bloody guts everywhere. -113-
James Dean: Hollywood
I like to drive into the copper colored hills at dusk, past the huge letters that spell out HOLLYWOOD, as if people would be lost if the name weren’t there to remind them where they are. Many of them are lost anyway. You can see old men and women sitting on their faded stucco porches, watching the sun go down, their feet stretched out before them in the burnt-sienna sunlight. The rich are getting ready to have cocktails in Beverly Hills or Brentwood, but there are no cocktails for the poor. No dinners at the Villa Capri. The poor drink cheap wine or unsweetened iced tea out of old jelly glasses , their hands shaking. They might have dinner once a week at some flyblown Italian restaurant where the sidewalks out front are cracked and huge dandelions grow out of the concrete. There are a few cheap hotels where nobody but people named Smith and Jones sign the register, and there are some cheap apartment houses for aspiring actresses, but most of them have faces like stale beer by the time they have been here a year. The lucky ones make it back to wherever they came from. Hollywood almost looks beautiful from the observatory at Griffith Park as the sky deepens, turning ocher, but it’s an illusion. -114-
Nude Photographs
Jan lies on a blanket, nude next to a small waterfall.
We made love minutes ago, but the sky’s still a blur through the eucalyptus leaves. Jan’s breasts seem huge
in the dappled spring light.
I stand over her, also nude,
as I adjust the lens and shutter of my Leica. Jan looks at me nearsightedly, smiling, without her glasses. Nearsighted, too, I try to focus on her nipples. It’s difficult. Oh God, it takes forever to focus, and everything’s burgeoning. -115-
Sirens
You don’t like to hear sirens at night
you tell me, as we hold each other.
The ambulance goes by. Outside, it’s raining.
As we lie in bed
I can’t help thinking about Frederick Henry and Catherine Barkley when she’s ready to die. It’s raining then.
I want to tell you:
I understand death
better than any character Hemingway ever invented, but I don’t. I say, “Everything will be
all right,” although I don’t believe it. You hold me even more tightly as we listen to the rain and the sirens and the faint cooing of the pigeons in our eves. You say, “Hold me, hold me,” and I do. -116-
Scars
An eight inch scar
curves across
your right leg,
and somebody else’s bone is where your kneecap used to be,
grafted there.
At the lower corner
of your left lip
there is a smaller scar, barely noticeable, the only
facial evidence remaining.
The plastic surgeon’s art hides the rest. After nine years you look up the name of the driver who hit you– Beam– but he isn’t listed in the phone book any longer. It is as if he never existed, but at night, especially, your leg still throbs. -117-
Imagining the Dead
Strange fish with no eyes hover at the bottom
of the prehistoric lake. Paiutes believe the spirits of Indian children murdered more than a century ago rise from the blue depths, where they sleep eternally beside the cui-ui fish,
on moonlit nights.
The Paiutes build bonfires beside Pyramid Lake, watching.
I can feel the heat rising
as I cross the saltflats, imagining Marilyn Monroe, imagining Gable and Monty, imagining Marilyn’s aborted babies, imagining all
the dead. It has been 40 years since The Misfits was filmed on these saltflats. The stars are all gone now, but the cui-ui fish still hover on the bottom of the lake and the Indians watch, waiting. -118-
Kit Knight
Kit Knight received a B.S. in Communications from California University of Pennsylvania. She has published more than 600 poems in magazines such as Poetry Now, The Louisiana Review, Caprice and Poetry Motel. She co-authored A Marriage of Poets with her husband, Arthur Winfield Knight. They also co-edited the Beat Generation journal, The Unspeakable Visions of the Individual. Kit Knight also published Women of Wanted Men. Her forthcoming collection of poems is Women of War -119-
Trying Desperately
“What do you know about it?” he sneered. “You’ve never worked.” He added, “Unless you’re gong to count
those four months you worked as a telephone solicitor.”
My eyes narrowed. “Three,”
I said, “it was only for
three months.” I added, “Work is what you do when everything depends on what you do.” Calmly,
I listed my qualifications: “Nine weeks in a coma, seven months in hospitals, five operations,
two crushed knees,
brain damage that resulted
in a stroke, seven pelvic fractures—and I still
carried a baby to term.” Quietly, I added, “I work more in an hour than you do in a day. Trying desperately to stay on my feet. Trying desperately not to snarl my words. Trying desperately to be normal.” -120-
Invisible Strings
Two of the group
were from Pittsburgh,
three were from San Francisco
and the sixth was born in
Rhode Island. The couple from
the Steel City were showing
the out-of-towners
their city. The tour included
a ride on the Duquesne skyline,
a stop in a jazz joint
that was too loud and smoky,
and a drink in one of those
trendy, upscale bars with
hanging ferns. The barmaid correctly identified me as
a perfect white wine drinker
and I watched her smile
when Michael ordered
a Black Russian. I almost
heard her murmur,
“A man’s drink.”
When the musicians took
a break, I made it a point
to tell them I enjoyed
listening. Artists need encouragement. As the group sauntered between places
of interest an outsider
wouldn’t have been able to tell which three men belonged
to which three women, even though the couples had been paired
for years. The group walked
and conversations went in threes. The group shifted again, and three new conversations began. We moved together, as a school of fish glides. But the easy movements weren’t as fluid as they might have been because five of the group made subtle and -121-
not-so-subtle changes to accommodate the blonde Yankee who limped. -122-
Spirit of the Skies
(my own war)
As I lay dying,
the radio was tuned
to a top 40 station.
The theory being stimulation is good.
A priest gave me
Last Rites
in the emergency room; I wasn’t expected to live through the transfer
to a larger hospital
with a trauma unit.
I was a senior in high school and disgustingly average.
I don’t remember the priest, I don’t remember the E R and I don’t remember
being hit by the car. Or flying 42 feet.
Toward the end
of my nine-week coma,
every time I drifted awake “Spirit of the Skies”
was on the radio. It was 1970. Now, I hear that song
on oldies stations
and with knife sharp clarity my transfused blood,
multiple scars and